Momentous Eventus: No Diet, No Pants Edition

"If you could kick the person in the pants responsible for most of your trouble, you wouldn't sit for a month." Theodore Roosevelt

As the weather is finally starting to look up here in Lisbon, some of you have likely been tirelessly catching up on and/or freaking out about that “summer bod.” Meanwhile, we here at Atlas would like to wish you both a very happy 30th International No Diet Day and a glorious 22d International No Pants Day! The former is s an annual celebration of body acceptance, fat acceptance, and body shape diversity, while the latter is, well, pretty self-explanatory. And while you do with that what you will, here’s some stuff happening this weekend and onwards to help you just be yourself, pants pending:

May 6
IMPROVISATIONAL JAZZ CONCERT:
Formed in 2016 and with three albums under their belt, local improvising noise-makers The Selva come to MONO Lisboa tonight to explore some “broad musical intersections” and present to you an “unpredictable and multi-idiomatic dialogue.” Entry is 10-10,70€.

May 6-8
SOLO CLOWN PERFORMANCE:
Meanwhile, a local bookseller comes across a copy of Don Quixote, transforms into Donna Quixota, and, thus, through her books, embarks on an adventure of unlimited possibility. In other words, Chapitô’s 15th Edition of their Cycle of Female Clowns commences tonight, with two more performances tomorrow and Sunday. Entry is 10€.

May 7-8
LATE-NIGHT TECHNO PARTY:
If you, however, are looking for a smooth blend of Italo-disco, gothic subculture, the bass lines of electro, and the riffs of rock merging together into indie soundscapes, and/or some good old-fashioned techno and EBM this Saturday night, then Graveyard Thrills feat. Carlos Matos VS All Synths Day is the place to be. Entry is 4-7€ (complete with a good old-fashioned free beer!)

May 8
TWO CLASSICAL CONCERTS:
And this Sunday, the Gulbenkian Orchestra invites you to two presentations of Nathaniel Stookey’s The Composer is Dead — a unique auditory murder investigation tale where the musical instruments are the main suspects and, therefore, use “musical arguments” to defend themselves. Tickets are 10€.

Now through May 30
SOLO MULTIMEDIA ART EXHIBIT:
Speaking of dark, Lisbon-bred and Vienna-based artist Hugo Canoilas’ Sculptured in Darkness at the Gulbenkian is a multisensory study of the bottom of the ocean. In it, sculptures of glass, acrylic resin, and textile and tactile objects “build layers that accumulate and superimpose,” and it “houses a series of ecosystems, in which each object-thing-creature acts on the other, losing its autonomy and unique identity.” Tickets are 18€.

Now through Aug 29
GROUP MULTIMEDIA ART EXHIBIT:
And speaking of darkness, French patron-of-the-arts Antoine de Galbert’s Traverser la nuit at the MAAT is a collection of work by over 50 international artists on the topic of night, which, in the words of the organizers, “continues to permeate and infuse art with the philosophical, political, societal, ecological, and scientific questions it raises.” Entry is included in the 9€ museum ticket (which is free this Sunday, by the way).

TICKETS FOR FUTURE STUFF THAT ARE LIKELY TO GO FAST:
Always up-and-coming Lisbon-based, internationally-made, and universally just-plain-weird punk trio The Tourorists comes to Zirkus Mond on May 14th to unleash their officially second EP onto you, and tickets to attend world history are a mere 8€. (Editor’s note: This is naked self-promotion by the writer and we only accept it because of nepotism.)

Jardim Sonoro 2022 — the festival formerly known as LISB-ON — is set to hit Lisbon in early September for three days of outdoor DJ sets and concerts of ambient, techno, disco, house, jazz, soul, funk, pop, and hip-hop music, plus some environmentalist activism, and tickets start at 36,40€.

And, finally, Wikipedia-described as a “Russian feminist protest punk rock and performance art group based in Moscow” Pussy Riot is coming to Lisbon on June 9th (sanctions-pending), and tickets are 22€. Thus, you’ve been warned.

See our events calendar for more fun under the sun in the coming weeks.
And stay beautiful, dear Lisbon.

On Key

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